Most of my adult life and even
already in my teens, I have felt pressure of some kind. I am sure many can
relate to that. At times I also did not really know how to enjoy life and to
relax. Mostly it has been difficult also to cease from striving in front of
God. There is always another challenge, always something to pray for, another
spiritual battle to fight. However, living like that all the time is guaranteed
to wear us out. We need to regain strength and to be able to rest and relax in
the presence of God.
How is it possible to do that? How
to experience and rest in God who is loving and caring, good and gracious, full
of unconditional love, present and accessible, accepting, just and trustworthy?
I am learning that still, but I can share some insights I have received and how
I am currently experiencing that.
I recently came to Jesus and felt
rested simply in the thought that He knows and understands exactly what I am
going through. It appeared that I needed that most. He understands. He
validates my feelings. And He is there for me. Jesus says: “Come
to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest” (Mathew
11, 28). Jesus is making this invitation to us to come to Him. Jesus
misses you, just to be with you. It can be difficult to cease striving, lay it
all down and just to rest in Him, but this is the way we gain strength.
Some years ago in a moment when I felt
unwell on the inside, for the first time with the eyes of my spirit I saw my
soul as a crying baby in need of comfort. Now at times I come to the Trinity –
God the Father, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit as a baby and experience that I am
welcomed, fed and changed, calmed down, sung over and played with. I think in
order to be restful and filled up by God, we need to come to Him as child who
cannot give much, but can nevertheless be enjoyed, loved and taken care of.
At times, it is restful to revisit
some places with Jesus in the spirit. For instance, perhaps I have rushed
through some site when traveling, but I can revisit the same place with Jesus
in my spirit and simply talk there and spend time with Him in a relaxed way. I
can go back to some situation and see how Jesus was present there. Once after
attending a sale which was a rush, I later revisited the place with Jesus and saw
Him going right next to me through the process and handpicking the stuff especially
for me, knowing the kind that I like, which will make me feel loved, cherished,
beautiful. I realized the things I was able to find were gifts prepared by Him
especially for me.
At times there are these moments in life
when I feel that some things are shaky and uncertain. And indeed, everything
which can be shaken will be shaken at some point, and only the things that can’t
be shaken will remain, things that are built on the stable Rock, God. I have
been especially comforted by this verse: "The eternal God is
your refuge, and underneath are everlasting arms" (Deuteronomy 33, 27). These arms are always there and we can
find rest in them, no matter what happens in our lives in a given time or
season.