Standing my ground and exercising influence

About six years ago in Finland, while being with a kid in a playground outdoors, I met another mother. I was invited to join a local mother’s meeting at a public facility in a neighborhood where we used to live. I went there with my son who was about a 1,5 years old back then. It was nice to socialize with other mothers, however, strangely the person who invited me acted very unkind in some situations. It was to the point that I questioned if I should continue to go as I did not know others there too well yet. However, as I spent time on the balcony in a warm autumn sun later that day, God turned my attention to this scripture in Psalm 36,12: “Don’t let the foot of the proud tread on me or the hands of the wicked drive me away.” I realized that God wants me to continue to attend these mothers’ meetings despite the feelings I had that day. I did so and it was a blessing to participate there for about three more years to come. And the person who had been unkind could not attend any more and disappeared pretty soon.

I would like to share another situation where I felt there was opposition to gaining more ground and expanding boundaries. After finishing my Bachelor’s studies, I was not really sure what to do, but eventually the option came up to return to my hometown to work there. During the time, I once saw a dream that I am walking the well known road to my parent’s house. However, as I was coming nearer, I saw a snake on the road. I continued to come nearer and when I was very near to it, the snake actually rose up its head, remained half standing (the way as cobras do) and started to hiss at me to try to prevent my passage. I tried to go around on one side or another, but the snake quickly turned either way I intended to go. Dream finished, but I later realized that there is a spiritual force that wants to keep me away from my parents and having a good relationship with them. 

Sometimes we are put in difficult places and situations. To have feelings of wanting to withdraw in some way, to leave, give up or quit is quite natural. I have sometimes wondered to God: “Is it worth to be here? I don’t see how it adds up.” Then God spoke to my heart: “Maybe it does not add up right now, but do it as a service unto Me. No matter what someone says, My truth is that you are the sun, and they are the moon. The only light they have and reflect is My light shining through you.” I have realized with time that God puts us in places for a reason and He wants me to stand my ground right where I am and not move an inch in shrinking back. This is my territory given to me by God, and to leave would be giving up ground. Enemy would be more than excited if we give up the territory and become less significant! At times, he will use people who don’t know better to accuse, reject, intimidate and threaten. However, God promises to increase our territory gradually if we don’t give up. "Little by little I will drive them out before you, until you have increased enough to take possession of the land.” (Exodus 23, 30) It does not mean necessarily that someone needs to be driven out physically; at times releasing is happening in spiritual realm and that changes situation. God encourages us: “Stand firmly in your place. Hold your ground.” (Ephesians 6, 13-14)

Initiating prayer with my father

During my current stay in Latvia, my father caught cold and after few weeks was also starting to have a fever and was diagnosed with pneumonia. Some days ago, I felt urge to offer him a prayer. We had not really prayed together so far. He has a vague faith in higher power, but would not consider himself a believer. It can be the hardest and scariest thing to step over an emotional chasm in a relationship and to try something new. But recently I have felt Jesus guiding me into new things and into believing that my closest relationships can change and Jesus wants them to change. I gathered courage, took some deep breaths and encouraged myself with the thought that God’s angels are going with me. I entered his room and asked how he is feeling. After a small talk, I found myself being uneasy and leaving the room without doing what I intended to do.

However, the urge that I need to pray with him did not leave me. I gathered courage and after a while, headed to his room again, thinking: “God, I guess I need not just angels with me now, but even archangels!” (chief angels such as Gabriel and Michael mentioned in the Bible) J  I entered his room once again where he was lying on the bed and then said straight away: “Dad, can I pray to God with you for your health?” To my surprise, it appeared as if he was prepared for me asking this. He readily accepted the offer and expressed hope that perhaps it may help. I sat down at his headside, placed my hand on his shoulder and started off by thanking God for sustaining us this far and loving our family. I prayed to God to heal my father and was lead to ask also to forgive his sins (as we can see from several healing miracles of Jesus in the Bible, healing is also related to forgiveness of sins). I prayed for few other topical matters for our family in a given moment. I finished in Jesus name, and afterwards my father thanked me. I left feeling victory and being glad I was able to step over myself to do this. His healing was not instant and he is still in recovery, but I nevertheless know that God was at work and the prayer also made it possible to show support to him.

I believe that initiating prayer with significant others can change a relationship and it is good to step forward in these ways. Praying for someone on your own is great, but praying together even better as it is inviting God into your midst and letting the other person experience God more presently and directly. We need however to be sensitive not to force prayer on someone who is not ready. It is best to ask permission before starting and to be sensitive as to how often to offer that. Prayer also may not fix everything – I also have experience of pouring myself out in prayer to the point of tears, and still as if hitting the wall, because the other person appeared to remain indifferent. This may happen, but I believe it is still better to occasionally try; to take steps of courage is better than to bear the pain and stagnation of being disconnected emotionally and having only a superficial relationship. God may do a deeper work even if it is not visible right away. If God speaks to your heart about this matter, would you consider initiating prayer with someone close to you even if you have never done that before? Would you meet someone at their point of need when possibly they are most open? It could be a wonderful breakthrough to see that this new thing is possible with God in that relationship!

Continuously refreshed by His Word

Perhaps around 10 years ago I had a dream. I saw crystal clear waters running from one terrace to another. There were many of them, in a similar fashion as rice fields have in mountain areas. After waking, I felt very refreshed. I knew that the waters I saw is the Word of God that can truly refresh and make us alive deep inside. I had renewed confidence that the Word of God has all we need and is more than able to sustain us. In the dream, the water was pouring in waterfalls from one terrace to another. All of them were filled to the point of overflow. It suggests to me that although the word comes from God, we can be living containers of it and it can flow from one to another. Thus, not only reading in private is important, but also speaking and sharing God’s word to one another as it is revealed to us.

It has taken some time in my Christian walk to really start to receive and to be deeply refreshed by God’s word. There have been some periods when Bible reading was a bit dry experience, perhaps due to hurry and pressures in some periods of my life. During my years of full time work, it was mostly  reading of one chapter in the morning when oftentimes I still felt sleepy. I think it is better than nothing, but it did not really refresh me. At times, God needs to plow the soil of our hearts so that we can truly be motivated to seek Him more seriously and then start to receive. I experienced then that God’s word was starting to come alive and speak to me personally. It can gain a third dimension by depth of personal meaning, and then fourth dimension by actually starting to move and bring changes in my life.

I have found that writing out verses which have particularly spoken to me is very important, and doing so repetitively, if needed, when the same verse appears meaningful again. For instance, at a time in my life when I was discouraged and confused, this verse was very powerful: “Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? Yet not one of them will fall to the ground outside your Father’s care. And even the very hairs of your head are all numbered. So don’t be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows.” (Matthew 10; 29-31) Another example, God has repetitively spoken to me through Isaiah 41, 15: "See, I will make you into a threshing sledge, new and sharp, with many teeth. You will thresh the mountains and crush them, and reduce the hills to chaff.” It has been empowering word when going through challenges, a reminder that God has greater victorious destiny and purpose for me and He is preparing me for that. When experiencing opposition, this verse has been reassuring: “No one will be able to stand against you all the days of your life. (…) I will be with you; I will never leave you nor forsake you.” (Joshua 1,5)
I recently visited an art exhibition in my hometown and few people whom I have not seen for some years noted that I am looking good or that they see God’s blessing in my life. While being put together or new hair color can make some difference, I would primarily ascribe looking good to God who loves to make His presence known through us. God’s word is very satisfying as it inspires and speaks deeply and personally, and we are being refreshed and renewed even as we walk through challenges.